


It's Not Over

by jaehyoons97



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Hanahaki Disease, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-03
Updated: 2016-02-05
Packaged: 2018-05-18 01:40:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5893231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaehyoons97/pseuds/jaehyoons97
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yixing never saw this coming</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't proofread this yet and it's 1:30 AM and my bed looks so tempting so pardon the errors if you see any. Oh and um, I'm so bad at giving titles, this is the best I can come up with I'm sorry if it doesn't represent the story much ;A;  
> Enjoy~
> 
> Note: The Hanahaki Disease is an illness born from one-sided love, where the patient throws up and coughs up flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. The infection can be removed through surgery, but the feelings disappear along with the petals.

**Title:** It’s Not Over  
**Genre:** Tragedy  
**Rating:** T  
**Pairing** **:** Zhang Yixing x Byun Baekhyun, Zhang Yixing x Kim Jongdae  
**Total word count:** 698

 

Yixing never saw this coming.

Sure, Baekhyun has always been the reason why his heart beats a little faster when their eyes meet, filled with warmth when they stand side by side, and clenches in excitement when they touch. But Baekhyun has always been close—emotionally and physically—to everyone that he assures himself to never think of him in a romantic way, despite the fact that he can’t deny the stabbing pain each time the vocalist is seen seeking attention from the other members and teasing them with extra touches and sometimes kisses.

And Yixing is convinced that the longing gaze Baekhyun gives to one certain member is a sign for him to not have any high expectations that his feelings will be reciprocated. So he’s trying, so damn hard, to ignore the thundering in his chest when Baekhyun smiles at him, and the urge to turn his head and kiss him that one time when Baekhyun blows air into his ear. It’s been going great so far, especially when his additional jobs allow him to actually stay away from Baekhyun—which really helps because it’s difficult to brush Baekhyun away when he latches to his arm and leans his head on his shoulder that he can smell the scent of his shampoo on his hair. ~~bruh the struggle is real~~  

So when Jongdae stares at him when they were talking, his brows furrowed in concern as he raises one finger to point at Yixing’s mouth and says “Are you chewing on a flower?”, Yixing instantly freezes.

He knows well about the illness and is fully aware of the symptoms. The illness itself is what causes Yixing to work this hard to fully avert his attention with the hopes of falling out of love with Baekhyun. He is certain that his feelings will die down any time soon, considering that now his focus is concentrated on filming, acting, work, _work_ , **_work_**. So why is this happening?

“Hyung?” Jongdae calls, pulling the older back from his reverie.

Yixing sticks two fingers into his mouth, reaching for the flower between his teeth and pulling it out. The flower is very small on his palm and he only dares to hold it by the stem, afraid that it’ll break at the slightest touch. The white crown cower from the world and Yixing is tempted to peek inside when he notices the tip of the petals curl outward, almost as if they’re inviting him to see what’s hidden underneath.

“What’s—”

“Lily of the valley,” Yixing cuts Jongdae’s words, recalling the time when Baekhyun told him about his birth flower, how the vocalist laughed and gave him a suggestive look with a little wiggle of his eyebrows as they both found out the flower represents _chastity_.

Jongdae snatches the flower from his hand and threw it in the bin. “I don’t fucking care what it’s called, I don’t remember the nutritionist-noona said something about including _flowers_ in our diet. What’s happening with you?”

Yixing bites his lip, not sure to tell Jongdae about the disease because he really hates making the others worried but Jongdae’s sharp gaze is slowly burning a spot on Yixing’s forehead as if he’s trying to cut it open to know what he’s keeping in his mind. Well, it’s a good thing that they’re alone in the room.

However, as he’s about to open his mouth to speak, something in his chest seems to be poking and Yixing winces at the soreness. It’s itching at his throat and before he knows it, he’s coughing more flowers out and Jongdae immediately jumps off of his seat to pat Yixing’s back to help.

“Shit, who’s doing this to you?!” Jongdae yells.

Yixing puts his hand over his heart, feeling it throb painfully. He can feel Jongdae gripping on his shirt in anger and Yixing rests his hand on the younger’s shoulder reassuringly.

“I’ll be fine. I’ve been taking meds for this,” he lied.

And as strange as it seems, Jongdae in fact buys his words. He then grabs a plastic bag from the dressing table to help Yixing collect the petals before throwing it away in the bin.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You know you can always make Baekhyun like you. That’s another option you might wanna consider.”
> 
> He goes rigid.
> 
> So Jongdae knows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 2!

**Title:** It’s Not Over  
**Genre:** Tragedy  
**Rating:** T  
**Pairing** **:** Zhang Yixing x Byun Baekhyun, Zhang Yixing x Kim Jongdae  
**Total word count:** 493

 

“You ass,” Jongdae greets him several days later. “Meds? Really? I looked up the disease last night and it says the only cure is to remove it through surgery.”

Yixing wipes his mouth with the back of his hand while using the other to flush the flowers down the toilet. He feels another coughing fit building up but chooses to ignore it and faces Jongdae instead.

“And seeing from our schedule I don’t think you’ve planned a surgery yet. Else all of us would have known by now.” 

And suddenly a shot of indescribable pain strikes at his lungs and Yixing bends over the toilet, feeling weak as his throat closes and only opens again seconds later to vomit another pile of flowers. Jongdae rushes over to his side and massages the back of his neck to ease the pain but it was no help.

“I’m telling Joonmyun-hyung,” Jongdae says as he stands up and Yixing immediately encircles his arms around the younger’s waist, not letting him leave.

“Please, Jongdae. Keep this from everyone, I’m begging you!”

Yixing is in tears, hanging onto Jongdae’s waist like his life depend on it and Jongdae reaches down to wipe the transparent trail on the older’s cheek. It hurts Yixing to see the worry in the younger’s eyes but he imagines it will hurt more if the others stare at him with the same eyes. Or worse: if Baekhyun stares at him with the same eyes.

“You know you can always make Baekhyun like you. That’s another option you might wanna consider.”

He goes rigid.

So Jongdae knows.

Yixing shakes his head weakly. “He loves Kyungsoo. And we can clearly see Kyungsoo loves him too. Who am I to get in their way…”

“A dying person in need of rescue, obviously. And to state the fact, hyung: you’re hot. It’ll be easy for you to make the little shit like you back.”

An appreciative smile finds its way to Yixing’s lips but is immediately replaced with a bitter expression. And as if reading his mind, Jongdae nods sympathetically and sighs.

“At any rate, you can’t just throw away your life like this, hyung. We don’t want you to. _I_ don’t want you to.”

Yixing nods in defeat. His throat is starting to itch again and with a sharp inhale, he sucks the flower that’s half way to his mouth back into his lungs. His vision then goes blurry and he can feel something hammering in his head.

Noticing this, Jongdae takes the older’s arm, putting it over his shoulder and helping him walk to his bed.

“Either you tell Joonmyun-hyung or I will,” the younger says and Yixing looks at him perplexedly. “And then they’ll clear out the schedule for you so you can get your surgery.”

“I’ll give you three days,” he lastly says before tucking Yixing beneath the covers.

Every bit of Yixing’s energy left his body as Jongdae walks out of his room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SORRY I JUST HAD TO PUT KYUNGSOO JUST FOR THE SAKE OF IT ;A;


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lilies of the valley are, apparently, poisonous.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 3!

**Title:** It’s Not Over  
**Genre:** Tragedy  
**Rating:** T  
**Pairing** **:** Zhang Yixing x Byun Baekhyun, Zhang Yixing x Kim Jongdae  
**Total word count:** 601 

 

Lilies of the valley are, apparently, poisonous.

Maybe that’s why Yixing has been having immense headaches and blurred vision (which also leads to disorientation) whenever he tries to swallow down the flowers if he ever feels the urge to vomit them in public. Maybe that’s why his case turns out to be more severe because apart from his lungs and throat, it’s affecting his nerves as well. Maybe that’s why the flowers he’s vomitting now are tainted in deep red stains and it’s only been less than 2 weeks since his infection.

Maybe that’s why he blacked out earlier at dance practice after coughing out mountains and mountains of flowers, the floor was no longer visible beneath the mass of white petals.

Baekhyun has also been unnecessarily close and does quite a lot of skinship that day. And while Yixing wraps the awful sting in his chest with a smile, Jongdae can hear his cry for help and drags Baekhyun away from Yixing everytime he sees the devil clings onto the older. He doesn’t forget to put up some antics when Baekhyun protests that Jongdae keeps disturbing the byunxing moments and retorts with “Mind you, Xingdae is obviously a better and way hotter couple than Byunxing because we both got abs”. To which, Yixing laughs and sends grateful gazes at the younger.

But of course, Baekhyun always finds a chance to slip in Yixing’s personal zone and when he sneaks a playful kiss on Yixing’s bare shoulder, Yixing looses his control and pukes and pukes and pukes. Once his lungs are empty, his consciousness fades and he hears someone calling his name before he completely faints.

 

_“Lu-ge! I saw the news, how are you feeling now?”_

_“Better, I reckon. They said I need to always have cans of oxygen with me to aid my breathing and drink glasses of hot tea because my throat is still recovering. Sorry for making you worry…”_

_“I’d be more worried if you keep vomitting daffodils. It’s good to have you back and healthy.”_

_“I guess, hahahah.”_

_“Did you end up telling Minseok-hyung, though?”_

_“I don’t think there’s a point in telling him. The feeling is no longer there anyway.”_

_“I see… How did it feel like? The surgery I mean.”_

_“Silly, of course I don’t remember. I was unconscious.”_

_“Hahahah. That’s true. But what about the aftermath, though?”_

_“Honestly? It’s… awful.”_

_“Awful?”_

_“Yeah. It feels as if a piece of your heart has been taken away forcefully. What’s left now is a hollow feeling in what’s used to be consisted of something.”_

_“Oh… I never knew that…”_

_“Me too.”_

_“Lu-ge, I’m truly sorry for you loss…”_

_“I am too.”_

 

Yixing wakes up to a sound of faint snoring beside him. When he notices the small figure resting his head on the same mattress that Yixing is lying on with his arms folded beneath his cheek, Yixing reaches out to touch the silver blond hair and the boy jolts awake.

“Hyung!” he exclaims and Yixing is engulfed in a hug (his chest sort of hurts from the contact, he reckons it’s because of the stitches) in an instant.

“I’m sorry,” Baekhyun sobs into his shoulder.

“It’s alright, Baekhyun. It’s not your fault,” Yixing reassures, his arms go around the other’s back and returns the hug. He waits for a bitter pang to strike his lungs that sends him into a coughing fit but it never came and he hugs Baekhyun tighter.

“I’m sorry,” Baekhyun repeats, over and over until Yixing notices the strange void beneath his chest. The older can only nod weakly.

"I am too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter to go~


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Luhan told him about his unrequited case with Minseok, Yixing agrees that the surgery goes against his moral ethics because technically it rips people away from their rights of being in love, regardless of the fact that the disease is slowly killing them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the last chapter~

**Title:** It’s Not Over  
 **Genre:** Tragedy  
 **Rating:** T  
 **Pairing** **:** Zhang Yixing x Byun Baekhyun, Zhang Yixing x Kim Jongdae  
 **Total word count:** 514

 

When Luhan told him about his unrequited case with Minseok, Yixing agrees that the surgery goes against his moral ethics because technically it rips people away from their rights of being in love, regardless of the fact that the disease is slowly killing them.

Being in love is a wonderful feeling, Yixing figures. That explains the reason why Yixing strongly refused the offer to undergo a surgery because who knows when’s the next time he’s going to feel that way again?

Being in love is hard, Yixing knows. Because the fact that your body can’t control what it’s doing to you demands you to be more aware of your feelings and gain more power in order to not let it drive you out of your senses.

Being in love is addicting. Because even though it hurts sometimes, and makes you cough flowers out of your infected lungs, the thrill of it is indescribably exhillirating it makes you crave for more.

So Yixing was dejected, indeed, when he woke up that day to find his feeling for Baekhyun has vanished. The hollow sensation in his heart was impossible to ignore and Yixing wanted to scream, to gawk at the surgeon to give his feelings back but he just chose to cry his sadness to sleep. When he left the hospital with Jongdae though, he knows he’ll be alright.

Yixing smiles at the thought of Jongdae.

He’s truly thankful to have Jongdae by his side to help him out (because let’s face it, sweeping thousands of flower petals is really a task when you’re alone), to hear his silent cry of help when nobody notices, and to make Yixing actually feels worthy of love. The aftermath of the surgery feels less burdening when Jongdae is there to cheer him on and although Yixing hates to rely on the younger too much, he must admit he’s grown a habit of seeking for Jongdae in any kind of situations he has.

And he’s really not one who is fond of favoritism, but Jongdae has earned a special spot in his heart.

“Hyung, really?”

Yixing looks up to find Jongdae before him, hands perching on his hips and Yixing smiles in embarrassment. The younger crouches down to collect bits of porcelain and flower petals with him.

“This is the third time you broke the flower vase,” Jongdae retorts in what sounds like irritation and amusement. He snatches a plastic bag and hands it to Yixing.

“I’m not covering your ass this time, have fun being scolded by Joonmyun-hyung,” the younger says before leaving to his room.

Yixing’s eyes follow Jongdae as he runs into Minseok at the hallway and he bites the insides of his cheeks when he sees them sharing a kiss.

Feeling intruding, he focuses back on shoving the broken vase and the now ruined forget-me-nots into the plastic bag. His throat still itches a bit but he’s gotten used to it by now.

He brings his hand over his mouth to cover as he coughs, ignoring the little blue flowers that he spits into his palm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg Yixing forgive me for doing this to you ;A;

**Author's Note:**

> Hi yes hello please leave some kudos if you like the story and comment down below if you have any feedbacks~ Let me feel the love~
> 
> Let's be friends and follow me on twitter @sasannisa


End file.
